With Thanksgiving later this month and celebrations of Christmas, Hannukah and Kwanza around the corner, the need for host or hostess gifts is rapidly approaching. For many, deciding what to bring as a host or hostess gift can be daunting.  

Non-crafty types (there had to be a reason someone invented gift bags), can consider visiting websites like RealSimple.com, HouseBeautiful.com and ThePioneerWoman.com websites (and many others–just google “hostess gifts”) have similar and many other ideas already packaged and ready to be ordered.  

However, before buying anything, find out what the host or hostess doesn’t like, TheSpruce.com recommends. “For example, if he or she doesn’t drink alcohol, you wouldn’t want to bring wine or any other type of alcoholic drink,” the website relates.  

If homemade gifts are an option, find out something the host or hostess likes. For example, if he enjoys snacking on chips and salsa, buy several tiny jars with different kinds of that topping. If she likes unwinding with a cup of tea, buy multiple flavors of the beverage. Some more (but certainly not all) ideas include different tiny chocolates, small jars of jelly, tiny bags of coffee beans or even some small prepackaged scented soaps. A farmers’ market will likely sell some of these items. Next, find or buy a box with a lid large enough for the purchased items and enough shredded paper to fill it about halfway. Arrange the items in a way that they all fit. Put the lid back on the box and add a ribbon or bow. Voila: homemade hostess gift.  

With that part of the host or hostess gift-giving process complete, here are a few pointers on giving it in a way that does not make the giver, receiver or other guests at the party uncomfortable.  

EtiquetteSchoolOfAmerica.com recommends giving the host or hostess their gift in a way that makes clear she or he will not have to stop everything during the party to take care of it or discuss it at length. For instance, the gift recipient should not have to search for spare bowls for the different kinds of salsa or spend lots of time reminiscing about the time they drank a certain flavor of tea. The website encourages passing the gift over as quickly as possible with words that politely insist that the host or hostess enjoy it another day.  

AllGiftsConsidered.com provides a few more pointers on host or hostess gifting, including giving the gift at the actual occasion (not earlier or later) whenever possible and not apologizing for its size or the amount spent on it. Remember, it should be the thought that counts.  

Jaycee Miller is a freelance researcher, blogger and writer living in New Jersey.