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Natural Awakenings South Jersey

Are Your Friends Helping or Hurting You?

Feb 05, 2016 02:49PM ● By Teressa Moore Griffin

Colin Powell once said, “The less you associate with some people, the more your life will improve.” Nevertheless, the opposite is also true. If you spend time with people that are moving in a positive direction, you will do so as well. It’s really that simple. We tend to Studies conducted by University of Washington’s Dr. Andrew Meltzoff suggest that we automatically mirror the things we see and that goes for the people who are closest to us.

In fact, according to professional speaker, Jim Rohn, “You’re the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” That’s something to think about. It also makes sense. We’re impacted by our environment—our physical surroundings and relationships. The people that we regularly interact with influence how we think, feel and behave.

Take the time to assess your closest associations—friends, family members and the co-workers you’re most closely aligned with. Ask yourself three questions posed by Andrew Horton on about this topic.

  • Are you surrounding yourself with people that will support your current journey?
  • Do these people have a desire to see you succeed?
  • Are they successful themselves or are they on a similar journey as yours?

Also consider: Who are the five people with whom you spend the most time? What are they like? Are they ambitious, motivated, respectful, inclusive and empowered? Are they learning and growing or are they wishing and hoping, whining and complaining, blaming and finger pointing, stuck in the story of their not-so-happy past?

If your assessment suggests your five closest friends are on the success and satisfaction track, hang in there with them. If not, change is needed. Begin by associating with one person that’s on the path you want to walk, achieving his or her goals and vision.

The same way people going nowhere can drag you down, those that are on the right path to achieving their goals can lift you up and effortlessly inspire and motivate you to do the same.

Teressa Moore Griffin, MEd, is an executive coach, author, radio personality, media thought leader and speaker who focuses on helping people overcome the LIES (labels, illusions, excuses and stories) that create obstacles to success. For more information and a related blog, visit

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